Entries by Susan Edmunds

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Tips for sleep-deprived parents

I’ll bet you $100 that, at some point in the nine months of your pregnancy, someone said: “Make the most of your sleep now, you won’t get any more for 18 years LOL LOL LOL!” (or some variation on that theme) Somehow the experience of sleep deprivation – something that is actually used as torture […]

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How to tackle whinging

The lid on the sistema container not being perfectly straight. Me throwing out an empty fruit sachet that everyone assured me they did not need. Only being able to keep one hat on at a time. These are just three of the things that have sparked a full-scale, my-world-is-about-to-end meltdown in recent days, or worse […]

How to have a birthday party

All of my son’s friends seem to have their birthdays within about four months of each other. As we approach the next round, anxiety seems to be growing. Do we do it at our homes? Would they behave if we went out in public? How much do we need to set up to entertain them? […]

How clueless were we…

As part of getting sorted for the new year, I’ve been setting some goals. There’s all the stuff you might expect – stop substituting sugar for sleep, exercise more, finish the novel that’s on draft number five, apologise to those who read draft one and two… To help the process, I set up a spreadsheet […]

Baby stuff to look forward to

There’s no shortage of lists of the stuff that’s not so great about having a newborn. But now my second baby is one, and I’ll probably never have to go through all of the stretch marks and the labour pains and the newborn feeding dramas again, I can give you a list of some of […]

Is it worth buying … a Lulla doll?

The woman in the shop warned: “This isn’t going to be an overnight miracle.” I must have had sleep deprivation plastered all over my face. When they first became available in this country, I remember thinking the idea of a Lulla doll was kind of sad. Kids who were desperate to share their parents’ beds […]

Your 20-step guide to bedtime, by my three-year-old

Step one: Begin early. About 4pm, focus on appearing very tired. Give one-word answers to questions and gaze off into space at regular intervals. Step two: About 5pm, start complaining. If your parents ask you to do anything – at all – there’s no need to comply. Simply say “I’m tired”. Or whine. That’s fine, […]

What not to say to a new mother

Here’s a public service announcement. If you’re about to go and visit a friend with a new baby, there are a few things that you just should not say. Under no circumstances. Ever. All of these were said to me in the few weeks after my daughter was born almost nine months ago. Will you […]

When do I get my mum voice?

Before I had kids, I didn’t have a whole lot to do with them. I thought they were cute when I passed them in the street, I attended baby showers and I visited friends with newborns. When my first was on the way, I assumed that a lot of what I would have to do […]